From Silent Eldest Daughter to Unapologetic Storyteller. A Nigerian-Italian writer and tech professional
I’m Sidiqot Abimbola Abale a 35-year-old Nigerian-Italian writer and tech professional, eldest daughter, and recovering people-pleaser. I was born in Lagos, raised in a small town in northern Italy, and now split my time between Milan and London. I live in between: languages, cultures, and uncomfortable truths—not by choice, but by necessity.
Mosunmola is the name of the main character in my first book— a memoir. It is one of my Yorùbá names that’s not on my passport. It means “I’m close to prosperity,” where Ọla speaks of grace, blessing, dignity, and becoming. This name carries the weight of what my parents hoped for me—and what I’m still learning to claim.
Why I Write
I write because I spent most of my life swallowing stories to keep other people comfortable. Because at 35, I’m still learning to apologize less and take up space without guilt. Because I spent years in therapy trying to name what happened to me—and my mother still doesn’t know the full story.
I write for the eldest daughters still carrying everyone else’s weight. For the diaspora kids who never feel “enough” in any culture. For the women learning to disappoint the people they love without abandoning themselves.
In a world that tells Black women to be strong, immigrant daughters to be grateful, and eldest daughters to be selfless, my work asks a dangerous question: What if we stopped?
My Work
My memoir, What I Couldn’t Say: An Eldest Daughter Between Nigeria and Italy, releases in May 2026. It’s the book I always thought I’d be brave enough one day to publish—two decades of journals transformed into a story about silence, survival, and speaking back. Read more about the book →
You can also explore essays that expand the memoir’s themes on my blog, including:
I’ve shared my work at SOAS University London and other institutions, libraries, and community spaces across Italy and the UK, exploring the intersections of race, family, identity, and belonging.
By day, I work in tech startups, where I’ve learned to negotiate for myself and claim space in rooms that weren’t built for people like me. By night, I’m wrestling words onto pages and learning that my voice doesn’t need permission to exist—writing, still, for who I was at 14, who I am at 35, and who I’m still becoming.
When I’m Not Writing
I’m eating groundnuts or dancing barefoot around my home—reclaiming the smallness I was taught, the noise I was told to quiet, the space I was never supposed to take up.
Connect with Mosunmola
📧 Newsletter: Join here for exclusive memoir excerpts, essays, and updates
✉️ Email: admin@mosunmola.io
📱 Instagram: @mosunmola.io — Behind-the-scenes writing, book updates, and reflections on identity
💼 LinkedIn: Sidiqot Abale — Tech career, writing journey, and professional life
Ready to dive deeper?
From Silent Eldest Daughter to Unapologetic Storyteller. A Nigerian-Italian writer and tech professional I’m Sidiqot Abimbola Abale a 35-year-old Nigerian-Italian writer and tech professional, eldest
(Part I: Public Version) The first time I understood I was the “eldest daughter,” I wasn’t old. I was eight, standing in our kitchen in
The first time I understood that my skin meant something to other people, I was nine. Not in the poetic, “my identity blossomed” way people
